Stories Archives | SmallTalk

From My Heart to Yours: A Grandmother’s Perspective on Children’s Therapy

Featured, General, Stories, Therapy | May 20, 2025 3 min read

By Shauna Oakes

Sometimes, when I walk through the halls in one of our clinics, I hear laughter creeping out from therapy rooms. At times I hear the frustration of a child who is just learning constructive ways to express emotions. And other times I see creative art pieces lovingly assembled by small hands or groups of children learning to work together. But every day, I feel a deep sense of gratitude that this is the work I get to be part of.

I’m a grandmother and that role defines my heart. But I’m also the administrative director here at SmallTalk Pediatric Therapy-a place that has become a second home not just for me, but for so many families navigating life with little ones who need a bit of extra support.

From the desks I have occupied, I have seen it all: the worried looks of new parents walking in for their first visit, the nervous energy of kiddos not quite sure why they are there or what to expect. But then-over time-the incredible transformation that happens when trust, patience, and care take root.

The Strength in Showing Up: A Message to Parents

What I want parents to know is this: you are doing enough. You are showing up for your child in a world that can sometimes feel overwhelming. You are not alone.

As a grandmother, I often find myself watching these children as if they were my own grandbabies. I see their bravery, their moments of frustration and celebration. I watch them find their voices, their balance, their confidence and I feel so much pride, even if I’m just a tiny part of their journey.

As a mother, I recognize the deep sacrifices you make-your time, your energy, and sometimes other interests you may have had to put on the back burner. I hear your concerns, and I love to see, hear and celebrate with you the victories, especially the ones that once felt out of reach.

Therapy Is a Relationship, Not Just a Service

Therapy, to me, is not just a service. It’s a relationship. It’s a safe space where children are reminded that they are capable, that they matter, and that they are deeply loved for who they are not just for what they can do.

And for the families who walk through our doors: I hope you feel that we care about not just your kiddo but we care about you. I hope you feel our belief in your child, in your family, and in the progress that sometimes comes in inches, not miles. I know the road can be long. I have witnessed it myself over and over again. But I also know how beautiful it can be when you have the right people walking it with you.

Celebrate Every Milestone—Big and Small

So from one grandmother’s heart to another parent’s hands-thank you for trusting us. Thank you for letting us celebrate your child’s growth, step by step. You may not always see it in the moment, but there is magic in the work we can do together. And I promise, from where I sit, it is the most meaningful work I’ve ever known.

Shauna Oakes is the Administrative Director at SmallTalk.

How to help children on the spectrum develop friendships

Clinic, Educational, Speech Therapy, Stories | Mar 07, 2022 5 min read

In my high school, a peer known for his social awkwardness greeted me in a monotone voice, “Pratt, do you have anything to say to me?” I replied, “Yes, good morning. How are you doing today?” Satisfied with the exchange, he nodded and walked to class. He did not return the greeting, nor did I expect him to. He also never asked me how I was doing.

There is an expression that “the only way to have a friend is to be one.” But what if you struggle to read facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice? For children on the autism spectrum, making friends can be challenging. From the young child who sits alone on the playground to the high schooler who chooses to stay in the computer lab rather than interacting with their classmates at lunch, it may appear that these children have no interest in pursuing friendships. Unfortunately, this is a common misconception held by neurotypical people (not on the autism spectrum).

The child on the playground and the teenager in the computer lab may be overwhelmed by the noise and chaos of the children around them or the location where social interaction occurs. Other behaviors of children on the spectrum include lack of eye contact, fidgeting, and repetitive movements (arms flapping, rocking, etc.). Many of these actions help limit overstimulation, manage anxiety or help with focus, but they can be perceived as a lack of interest by their neurotypical peers. Neurotypical children may conclude that their counterparts with autism are disinterested. But appearances can be misleading.

Children on the spectrum often long for friendships but do not know how to develop them. The importance of peer relationships is well understood. Friendships can provide opportunities to learn important social and emotional skills, including empathy, cooperation, problem-solving, and similar prosocial skills. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true; negative peer relationships involving bullying, rejection, and manipulation result in feelings of isolation, anxiety, depression, and confusion about relating to others.

Luckily, there are many ways to support children on the spectrum. Here are some steps you can take to support your child in making a new friend:

1. Explain what a friend is:

For young children, keep things simple. For example, explain to them that “a friend is someone who is nice to you and likes to spend time with you.” Understanding abstract concepts can be difficult for young kids on the spectrum. It helps to discuss characters in a movie or tv show that the child enjoys. Ask questions such as, “Is Character X being nice to Character Y? Do they like playing together?”

2. Social Stories

Children with autism often learn better when they are provided with visual support. Social stories lead a child through specific situations using pictures and words. Each story can be tailored to the child. For example, writing a script or drawing out the course of a conversation can help children understand the basics of how to talk to a friend. ***Carol Gray is a good resource.

3. Practice is Key

The best way to try something new is to explore it first in a safe and familiar environment. Have your child practice social skills (greeting others, asking and answering questions, self-advocating, suggesting ideas for play) among people the child already knows and is comfortable with (siblings, cousins, neighbors, and other adults). Through practice and repetition, you and your child can problem solve challenges he might have before encountering them at school or on the playground.

4. Finding Your Tribe

To build friendships, children must first share common interests. Find what your child is good at or enjoys, and then find a community based on that interest. For example, if your child loves board games, find a gaming group. If your child plays an instrument, get them into the band at school. Finding a shared activity is key, and it provides the groundwork for children to further grow friendships by sharing their feelings or by sharing a positive emotional experience.

Sometimes, however, it’s not about what groups children with autism join; it’s about getting other children to join them. Some schools implement a playground ambassadorship program, where neurotypical students are tasked with engaging students who tend to remain on the periphery of the playground. These children look for peers who are not engaged and reach out to them/ask them to play. Parents may want to ask their schools if this program is already in place or can be implemented. You are your child’s best advocate.

SmallTalk wants your children to “find their tribe” and make long-lasting connections with peers. Therefore, SmallTalk offers small social skills group sessions at each clinic location to help teach your children the foundations of social skills and offer guided practice of engaging in different social scenarios with peers. If you are interested, please call us at (619) 647-6157 to schedule an appointment.

Feeling the LOVE

Activities, Educational, Speech Therapy, Stories | Feb 03, 2022 3 min read

February is here! And so are our themed therapy activities. We love thematic learning – it is relatable and helps kids make meaningful connections within their everyday lives.
Here are some of our favorite ideas to try incorporating at home:

Books about Feelings and Love

Themed books are a great way to teach vocabulary, encourage early literacy, and promote positive relationships and acceptance. When reading books with your child, we recommend using the “PEER” approach.

P: Prompt your child with a question about the story. Prompting your child focuses attention, engages the child in the story, and helps the child understand the book.
Point to something in the picture, for example, a balloon. “What is that?”

E: Evaluate your child’s response.

“That’s right! That’s a balloon.”

E: Expand on what your child said.

“That’s a big, red balloon! We saw one of those in the grocery store yesterday.”

R: Repeat or revisit the prompt you started with, encouraging your child to use the new information you’ve provided.

“Can you say big, red balloon?” Each time the book is reread, the expanded vocabulary words are verbalized again.

Here are some books worth checking out:

Froggy’s First Kiss, by Jonathan London
The Day it Rained Hearts, by Felicia Bond
Guess How Much I Love you, by Sam McBratney
Love Splat, by Rob Scotton
Love Monster, by Rachel Bright
Love You Forever, by Robert Munsch
The Giving Tree, by Shel Silverstein
Llama Llama I Love You, by Anna Dewden
No Matter What, by Debi Gliori

Making Valentines

Arts and crafts activities are a great way to work on making choices, requesting and describing during play. Here are some useful strategies to incorporate during the craft at home:

Provide two choices during card-making: “Do you want the heart or the lip sticker?” or “Do you want the purple or red crayon?”
Model the use of adjectives: “Ooo, I pick the sparkly, red and white heart!” or “I’m going to draw a big chocolate candy.”
Teach location concepts: “Do you want to put the sticker in the middle or on the side?” or “Let’s write your name on the front.”
Practice “who” questions by asking who your child wants to make the card for.
Sabotage. Give your child an unsharpened pencil or a glue stick with the lid still on it so that they need to ask you for help.

Trip to the Post Office

Once your Valentines are complete, we recommend taking your kids on a trip to your local post office. Here are some ideas on how you can incorporate speech and language skills into the outing:

Teach related vocabulary: stamps, envelope, delivery, etc.,
Model comments: “I see a mail truck!” or “Wow, look at all of those mailboxes!”
Verbally sequence the steps to mailing a package: “First you fill the box, then you tape the outside, next you write the label…”
Take turns dropping mail into the mailbox and discussing who the mail is for.
Practice ordering stamps at the counter.
Bonus: Let your therapist know if you went on the outing, that way it can be a topic of conversation in their speech session. :)

We wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day and look forward to hearing how your activities go! We LOVE meaningful activities, making connections, and all of our wonderful families at SmallTalk.

Author: Julia Navarra, M.A., CCC-SLP, Speech-Language Pathologist